I'm visiting a new school for a few weeks. Today I did a class with san-nensei (ninth graders). Some of them asked me questions they'd prepared earlier. One girl asked me the following:

"How many girls do you eat?"

Whoa. Is she actually asking me how many women I've cunnilingified? Though there was no other rational interpretation (barring cannibalism), I couldn't believe it. I acted confused for a while, and eventually the teacher laughed and explained that, yes, holy fuck, she *was* actually asking me that. Japan's very liberal attitude towards sex never bothered me before. Quite the contrary! (Well, maybe they could do without the manga kiddie porn, the budding pedophile's Flinstones Chewable Vitamins.) But all I could do was give this girl a "What in the fuck is wrong with you?" look and move on. I'm pretty sure this was my first-ever Grumpy Old Man calibre "what's wrong with the damn kids these days?" moment.

She figured you were a cunning linguist, since you'd managed to, um, wrap your tongue around Japanese?

Nope. Can't think of another pun to jam into that. Welcome back to the blogging world.

I'll put that into the "things I'm grateful my students haven't asked me" (yet) file.

Having to explain what a speculum is to a bunch of college students (I was lecturing on 19th C. American women's history) stands out as a moment never to be repeated...